I wanted to share my immense gratitude to my cousin, Adrienne for extending herself way back when I began my search for housing in Portland. She helped me land this place (Macleay Gardens). It's been over a year and a half already since I've moved in...this is a place I've come to know as home and while it isn't permanent, I have made the nicest circle of friends (most of whom were out-of-state and looking for connection too) in this complex, friends that will always be friends and friends that I have made really nice memories with- that connection helped me stay grounded in times of uncertainty and it made it easier to commit to living in Portland, even when I was jobless and wondering if I had made a mistake in moving 1,000 miles from home.
What made me think of all of this is that my circle of friends is shrinking - two of the last neighbor friends, Bernie and Martha just moved to NE Portland and I am missing them immensely already and feeling fairly lonely. While my heart feels a little empty and blue without their presence, it's equally weighted by gratitude that I can experience such a depth of emotion for people who were once strangers. I remember meeting them in the parking lot days after I moved in. They were unpacking and moving their stuff into my 4-plex. I liked their down-to-earth aura immediately. We had a conversation about why they moved to Portland - they said they were recently engaged and looking for a place to call home and that Boston just didn't have what they needed to feel settled. I hoped that we could become friends.
Who would have known that we'd become such nice friends and that I would attend their wedding a year later (see photo of vegan doughnuts they got special for me)? We shared the one-and-only and intense Arctic Blast 2008 together, watching snow from Bernie and Martha's living room while sharing Hannukah and Christmas together. We shared weekly soccer games and drinks at the local pub, Lompoc together. We convened in the courtyard for stories, laughs and to let our dogs run rampant. We performanced the giddiest of dance routine together for Meg's 24th birthday (yes, 24!).
When I moved here, everything was so unfamiliar. I felt like I had regressed. I was resistant to living without privacy of a backyard. I worried that Charlie would never get along with the at least 20 other dogs in this complex. He befriended a puppy who doubled in size and is now one of his pals and he eventually learned to trust his guardian, Bernie (6'5" man!) to take him on walks while I was at work. I worried that my cats who had become accustomed to playing in my front yard would get cabin fever. They have favorite spots in the bush outside of my door and go no farther than 15 feet away from my front door. I worried I'd have no space to grow food and yet I managed to grow tomatoes, peas, peppers and strawberries in a tiny plot of poor quality soil.
Lastly, but most importantly, is that in this circle of friends was a woman who I would fall for, a woman who would become the "gateway"of sorts to my finally, finally, finally coming to terms with a truth I had intentionally ignored for nearly five years, a truth that pained me to confront.
I truly believe that when I put pen to paper nearly two years ago that this place manifested itself and that, if for no other reason, to address this vital piece of my life.
If I hadn't trusted my intuition on pursuing this place, if Adrienne hadn't taken the time to take photos, do walk-thru's and put a deposit down for this place, if ... If just one of those things hadn't happened, I would have ended up with one of the other rentals scribbled down in a notebook I just found tonight from my housing search and I would have experience an entirely different set of life experiences.
